{not for the faint of heart}

i've been reflecting on my first stint at the beiliu orphanage. while words won't do justice, i'll try to highlight a few exhilarating, heartbreaking, exhausting and even ugly moments. and then there are the hard realities; things i can't allow myself to focus on (too much) for risk of being completely overwhelmed and paralyzed. but with that said, all the more reason to trust god to do BIG god-sized things at this orphanage.

  
here's a small glimpse into my week there...

exhilarating moments:
-getting cameron (baby with extreme failure to thrive) safely to his new foster home (via sleeper bus + typhoon)
-getting brooke (baby in liver failure) to smile and laugh
-discussing potential medical management for those children with medical needs
-dreaming about what it might look like if the nannies knew the love of god
-getting permission for a teenage refugee(?) girl to come out of her locked room and help me care for the babies (not that i'm promoting child labor, but feeding a baby provides more human interaction than do the walls of her empty room)

heartbreaking moments:
-seeing 2 new babies arrive to the orphanage in the short time i was there
-hearing brooke cry when i put her back in her crib the morning i left

exhausting moments:
-me (one person) trying to make a dent in the needs of all the attention-starved children
-communication with nannies given the language barrier

ugly moments:
-losing my patience, especially when trying to help the older school-aged children understand that hitting, taking things from each other, etc., are not acceptable behaviors (but then feeling bad when i remember that they've never had loving instruction or discipline, and that most of what this environment teaches is survival)

some of the hard realities...
-too many of these children are malnourished
-too many of these children NEVER leave their cribs except for bath time
-too many of these children are getting older and/or have disabilities such that the likelihood of them ever experiencing life beyond the orphanage or the love of a forever family is highly unlikely

one truth:

the "fatherless" are mentioned throughout scripture; god has not forgotten about them.


it was a great and a hard week all wrapped up into one.  i'm thankful god has given me the strength to handle such work, as it is definitely not for the faint of heart. not sure what will be in store for me next month there, but i'll keep you posted.  :)

i'll leave you with 3 prayer requests:
1. for cameron to begin thriving and gaining weight 
2. for brooke to be accepted for a liver transplant 
3. for the children (like trey, robert, stephen, etc.) who are currently waiting... that they'd be matched quickly with their forever families